zensolo’s e-mailed chronicles posted by morituri.


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hello, one & all…apologies for th deafening silence these last…umm-three weeks already! – but reentry to

bittersweet paradise home & family is always difficult- feels like i’ve run some kind of high-adrenalin

‘mission impossible’ everyone disavows when i sit down to debrief.
then again, in th words of richard hugo,
‘this is th bad time, christmas
& th myths are honed fine’
…it’s become a recurrent season for mourning for me particularly since it wd’ve been th first wk of january

that i wd’ve become a father fifteen years ago, 1985…but for th simple but overwhelming fact that i was not

th love in th love of my life’s life… i just did my cold-turkey caffeine quit for two days when i felt a

cold coming on last friday- so i spent saturday & sunday- ‘las octavitas’, post-three kings day weekend tail to

traditional boricua christmas holiday partying- nodding out to th tune of fourteen- sixteen hours a day as i

pushd myself to slog thru a freudian psychoanalysts’ take on joyce’s ulysses- ‘th cast of characters’… i had

a great talk about possiblities related to some of my ideas last night after my first espresso in three days

around noon, no workout in four days either, so of course i couldn’t fall asleep until nearly six in th

morning… i’ve been rereading william gibson’s ‘count zero’ today & i’m just a little frightened @ how life

is imitating art in th development of h internet & th notion of ‘cyberspace’…also funny how it’s dated-

written in ‘86, a lot of th warring multinational conglomerates’ names are japanese… still, i’m in a state

-mood?- particularly susceptible to suspension of disbelief regarding th plausibility of any paranoid scenario

my imagination or any neighboring friend or flake’s can conjure up, especially after aol-time-warner-turner

seems like a done deal…
& on that note, reviewing stick-shift skills for th organic growth of two-way
love traffic ’til next time…d=(8{>

Written by morituri

January 11th, 2000 at 1:08 pm

Posted in Uncategorized

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